DO PEOPLE CONSIDER YOU A BIG BOY?
You’ve worked hard and all your roads have led you up to this stage of being a Big boy, you can now slowly pat yourself on the back.
First things first, all your big boy is all for nothing, if they don’t think you are a big boy. What is all the big boy for if you cannot pepper them?
Well as a Big Boy, there are certain things that announces your presence and your big boy status, here are a list of these things
- White Native or Jalabiya: This has been recognized as the national uniform of the Big Boys Association. If you are or want to be one please get your white native or Jalabiya. Make sure it is WHITE, not cream, not “was-white”, WHITE!
- Gold Chain: As a big boy, you need to bling up! It shows you have money and probably links with some rich Hausa men. I don’t know how that works, but that’s what they say. God forbid that you are a big boy and you don’t have gold. It is not a fashion statement; to be honest, you don’t really have to like it. Make sure you wear this chain at all times to avoid embarrassment from ‘smellos’. It is also advisable to dedicate a full Instagram post to it so that the haters can be aware that you have finally arrived.
- A Car: You need a car! This cannot be over-emphasized. If you drive a car that is below a Toyota Camry 2.2 aka Big Daddy, say these words after me, “YOU ARE NOT DRIVING A CAR”. You need to get yourself a car that announces your arrival into the big boy club. Think along the lines of Crosstour, Range rover, Mercedes Benz ML and the likes . That’s the ultimate swag of a big boy. A big boy without a car is just a boy. Sell that your car in 45 mins to Cars45.com, get paid and buy another car now!
- Expensive Phone:An expensive phone is super compulsory, preferably an iPhone. There’s no other phone big boys use asides from an expensive phone, most especially from Samsung S7 and iPhone 6s upwards. That makes your total packaging stand out.
- Sandals:As a big boy, you won’t be wearing any corporate wears because you don’t work for anybody and you are obviously a boss! So, you will need a lot of good looking Versace sandals and slip ons.
- Pop Bottles: It’s another Friday, and like every other big boy you have to mark register in some night club. Pop bottles of champagne and tension the whole town. Get your HUSH on!!!
Now that you know what to do to show your big boy status, you can go into the streets and PEPPER THEM!